Gentoo Founder on his way to Redmond

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Gentoo Founder on his way to Redmond 527

Posted by timothy on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:33PM from the ms-could-be-the-world's-largest-foss-company dept.

Rotworm writes "Recently former founder of Gentoo Linux, Daniel Robbins, has managed to procure employment with Microsoft. Robbins describes his position as "helping Microsoft to understand Open Source and community-based projects." Seemingly there's no scandals as Robbins managed to finalize the transfer of all Gentoo's IP to the Gentoo Foundation, Inc."

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Gentoo Founder on his way to Redmond

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Woah (Score:5, Funny)

by NilObject ( 522433 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:35PM (#12807787)

"helping Microsoft to understand Open Source and community-based projects"

Do they ship cluebats freight? I guess they do now.

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:35PM (#12807790)

He's probably going to kill younglings.

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Good luck! (Score:5, Funny)

by stevens ( 84346 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:36PM (#12807804) Homepage

I hope he is successful! I'd sure like to see Windows users have to emerge msoffice2k3 and wait for six days.

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YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:37PM (#12807809)

all your open source visionaries are belong to ms.

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Sweet Job! (Score:5, Funny)

by TheSolomon ( 247633 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:37PM (#12807810) Homepage

Man I wish I had his job. "OpenSource projects: Opposite in every way from Microsoft. Now where's my paycheck?!" =)

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Dr Who (Score:5, Funny)

by lkcl ( 517947 ) writes: <lkcl@lkcl.net> on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:37PM (#12807812) Homepage

is anyone here concerned about the parallels with the latest episode of Dr Who?

the game-shows where losers are beamed up to the Dalek Mothership?

EXTERMINATE!
EXTERMINATE!

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Linuxsoft (Score:3, Funny)

by Rotworm ( 649729 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:38PM (#12807830) Homepage Journal

And thusly we see the beginning of taking over Microsoft by getting on the inside, one at a time.

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by XpirateX ( 691224 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:39PM (#12807842)

Microsoft has just released a press release highlighting the new additions being implemented into Windows Longhorn (c). Most notable of these additions is an innovative "package management system" called l-merge. More information soon.

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Anakin (Score:5, Funny)

by srobert ( 4099 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:43PM (#12807880)

In a related story, Anakin Skywalker is serving as an aid to Senator Palpatine to help him understand the Jedi council.

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former founder? (Score:2, Funny)

by xluserpetex ( 666816 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:44PM (#12807892)

Recently former founder of Gentoo Linux, Daniel Robbins... so he traveled back in time and had someone else found it instead?

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It's gonna take them a while... (Score:3, Funny)

by Tsugumi ( 553059 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:46PM (#12807914)

The scene, drobbins standing in front of a bunch of expectant microsoft execs, all with their own pc.
"Today, class, we're going to learn about kde..."

...Two days and several thousand lines of gcc output later...

"Err, Mr Robbins sir, is this going to take much longer? I gotta go pee"

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by Tackhead ( 54550 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:47PM (#12807922)

> > Any idea what his employment contract may hold?
>
> He's probably going to kill younglings.
Hmm...

Do I reply with "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" or "It's a TRAP!". Decisions, decisions...

Decisions, decisions, decisions, decisions, decisions [ ... ] decisions! Decisions! I! LOVE! THIS! DISTRO!

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NOOOOOOOOO! (Score:2, Funny)

by Klync ( 152475 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:47PM (#12807928)

Daniel! You were supposed to be the chosen one!

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Microsoft uses PPC, Apple uses Intel, now this ? (Score:5, Funny)

by javaxman ( 705658 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:48PM (#12807950) Journal

It's official, we've crossed over into the Bizarro World.

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Re:Good luck! (Score:5, Funny)

by joe_bruin ( 266648 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:51PM (#12807979) Homepage Journal

They'll have it, but instead of emerge, the command is going to be called "pirate", and it won't get the source, it will download a binary via eDonkey. The only hard part is bootstrapping it. You have to boot into a DOS disk, set up your network and type "pirate winxp-pro".

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Re:Woah (Score:2, Funny)

by Qubit ( 100461 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:53PM (#12807991) Homepage Journal

"helping Microsoft to understand Open Source and community-based projects"

Do they ship cluebats freight? I guess they do now.

They're not even giving him a ticket in coach to get out to Redmond? Well, how about that for a warm welcome...

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Latency (Score:2, Funny)

by tepples ( 727027 ) writes: <tepples.gmail@com> on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:57PM (#12808029) Homepage Journal

Isn't Linux capable of multi-tasking?

GNU/Linux, *BSD, and Microsoft Windows NT series operating systems are capable of multitasking (use program A on your PC while program B is installing), but the installation process does introduce latency. You can use everything else on your machine, but you can't the package that you're installing from source, whether it be from a tarball, an SRPM, Gentoo ports, or FreeBSD ports, until it's built.

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Re:Anakin (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @07:59PM (#12808056)

More seductive the dark side is!

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Quick, we can still rescue him! (Score:5, Funny)

by WillAffleckUW ( 858324 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:05PM (#12808112) Homepage Journal

We'll cut the armed convoy off at SR-520 when they cross the floating bridge across Lake Washington and free him! I'll go rent a canoe down next to Husky Stadium and we'll rendevous at the traffic jam near the wind sculptures and set him free, then we'll transport him to the Arboretum and escape via the Museum of History and Industry parking lot in a small biodiesel VW car a friend of mine has.

Who's with me?

A small daring group is all it will take to rescue the founder of Gentoo - with luck on our side, skill, daring, and the element of surprise, we should be able to pull this off before the Empire gets him into Darth Gates compound!

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by dedazo ( 737510 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:12PM (#12808175) Journal
Section 2A - Notwithstanding any other claimants and /or vicissitudes related to the Contractee's employment therein while at Microsoft Corporation (C)(TM), Contractee heretofore agrees in full to instruct Microsoft Corporation (C)(TM) on how to:
- Develop an operating system that recompiles itself continuously, preventing the user from doing anything useful with their computers; and
- Create, develop and nurture a community of obnoxious prepubescent teenagers that believe they are '1337' (see definition of '1337' in Appendix D) 'haxx0rz' (see definition of 'haxx0rz' in Appendix E) because they're 'squeezing' (see definition of 'squeezing' in Appendix M) every ounce of 'computing power' from their WalMart (TM) eMachines (TM) Celeron (TM) 'boxen' (see definition of 'boxen' in Appendix R)
Section 2B - Contractee will also instruct Microsoft Corporation (C)(TM) on the use and operation of the computer program known as 'cvs'.
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can't wait! (Score:4, Funny)

by namekuseijin ( 604504 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:16PM (#12808217)

to wait 12 months while Longhorn stage1 compile and boot!

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You will never rescue him, We have him now! (Score:3, Funny)

by WillAffleckUW ( 858324 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:18PM (#12808228) Homepage Journal

A small daring group is all it will take to rescue the founder of Gentoo - with luck on our side, skill, daring, and the element of surprise, we should be able to pull this off before the Empire gets him into Darth Gates compound!

You underestimate the Power of the Gates side of the Source, my young apprentice! All your plans have been foreseen and even now this fully operational hovercraft is approaching the traffic jam to intercept your foolhardy rebels in their vain attempt to resist the Empire!

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Re:hmm... (Score:4, Funny)

by respyre ( 812609 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:34PM (#12808381)

.. developers, developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers! Developers! Developers! DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS! *wheeze*

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by forceflow2 ( 843966 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:40PM (#12808429)

This press release was soon followed by another press release stating I-merge had been pulled from Longhorn but could be expected to be released later.

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Ooooook, *scary* (Score:5, Funny)

by Lisandro ( 799651 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:51PM (#12808528)

So, lemme see...

- Apple goes x86,
- Debian releases new stable,
- Deep Throat reveals himself,
- Robbins works for Microsoft.

Seriously, what's next? Stallman stating "Meh, GCC takes forever; i'll just buy some software at Walmart"? Duke Nukem Forever going gold? The Bitboys compiting with nVidia? Microsoft releasing the source for Internet Explorer?

Cut this shit already. Please. It's not funny anymore!

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Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:4, Funny)

by bad_outlook ( 868902 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @08:54PM (#12808550) Homepage

Namesys is also having payroll problems, though our problem is more due to my divorce than anything else.

Perhaps if you would have paid more attention to her than that damn code!

me: one ticket to hell please...

bo (+2 Funny?)

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Re:Microsoft uses PPC, Apple uses Intel, now this (Score:5, Funny)

by Ingolfke ( 515826 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:15PM (#12808708) Journal

It's not Bizarro World at all... somehow Dvorak has managed to project his imagination onto our reality. Damn him and his alien technology!

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Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

by Spectre_03 ( 786637 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:18PM (#12808722)

And yet this is probably the first topic I have seen in a while that nobody will reply with the tired old /. addage of "I embrace our new {insert M$ cliche here} overlords."

Or is there really someone here that still has a sense of humor to poke a little fun at the linux crowd?

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Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:5, Funny)

by hansreiser ( 6963 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:19PM (#12808733) Homepage

Perhaps if you would have paid more attention to her than that damn code!

I like the code more. It is certainly more beautiful, and perhaps more useful too....

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Re:Ooooook, *scary* (Score:2, Funny)

by chiok ( 858005 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:21PM (#12808750)

Next thing you know and Roger Waters will do a reunion concert with Pink Floyd and Paris Hilton will get first-billing in several movies so that it can be legitimately said that she "does something"...

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Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by KaptNKrunchy ( 876661 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:31PM (#12808817)

Additionally, Windows will now take 11 days to install.

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Yes ! (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:33PM (#12808837)

Let's drag him back into poverty !!

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Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

by praxim ( 117485 ) writes: <<pat> <at> <thepatsite.com>> on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:41PM (#12808893) Homepage

I hear it used to be called My Merges.

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Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:4, Funny)

by oudzeeman ( 684485 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:43PM (#12808905)

your code can do the dishes?

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Re:Former Founder? (Score:2, Funny)

by ignavus ( 213578 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @09:51PM (#12808955)

As he has joined the Bor^H^H^HMicrosoft, he has to be written out of the history of the Gentoo project.

So yes, he IS the former founder.

PS: Gentoo is looking for a new founder.

And as for your Founding Fathers, they are too busy rolling in their graves to intervene in US affairs.

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Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

by dakara ( 798841 ) writes: on Monday June 13, 2005 @10:40PM (#12809293)

> I! LOVE! THIS! DISTRO!
you work for yahoo? :-)

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Fear not! (Score:3, Funny)

by Henk Poley ( 308046 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @03:13AM (#12810525) Homepage

Not to downplay your plans, but thousands of new apprentices are joining the Open Force movement every day. Not many of them are fully awoken, yet. Many of those will even never become a true master of the Force, still they help us in our fight against the empire by pointing the Way. Loosing a master may feel painful now, but the Force is already attracting replacement troops. Yes, troops, the power of the Force lies in it's multitude.

Besides this, we haven't had communications with Daniel Robbins recently so his plans might be cloaked. I feel this event as only a small disturbance in the Force. The Force is strong!

May the Counsel of the FSF guide your ways.

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Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

by Afrosheen ( 42464 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @03:45AM (#12810609)

No, Debian has the snobs and bigots covered, we Ubuntu users just borrow from their repositories.

It's like having an asshole big brother that throws you the keys to his Camaro once in awhile.

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Re:hmm... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @05:28AM (#12810892)

I thought Microsoft users already were "a community of obnoxious prepubescent teenagers that believe they are '1337' [...] 'haxx0rz'". Looks like MS hired the wrong guy...

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Re:YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME (Score:1, Funny)

by lukestuts ( 731515 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @05:46AM (#12810939) Journal

Someone set up him the $$$!

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Re:hmm... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @07:12AM (#12811196)

How can you possibly insult someone that has a family to support, and bills to pay?

How 'bout "hey you, wage slave, come over here and polish my shoes!"

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Longhorn (Score:2, Funny)

by alewar ( 784204 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @07:33AM (#12811279)

emerge longhorn! emerge!

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PLD seeks NBF*. (Score:3, Funny)

by Opiuman ( 172825 ) writes: <redbeard@gma[ ]com ['il.' in gap]> on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @08:40AM (#12811604) Homepage

*Popular Linux Distro seeking Non-Borg Founder.

emerge founder!

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Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

by 2old2rockNroll ( 572607 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @08:48AM (#12811640)

Additionally, Windows will now take 11 days to install.

Well, that's 10 days less of being a nuisance on the internet.

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Re:Bad moderation (Score:2, Funny)

by kurtmckee ( 870398 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @10:06AM (#12812395) Homepage

[Microsoft] didn't become a near monopoly solely out of luck

You misspelled "convicted".

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Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

by jlp2097 ( 223651 ) writes: on Tuesday June 14, 2005 @04:54PM (#12817288) Homepage Journal

.. badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, MUSHROOM! MUSHROOM
Badger Badger [badgerbadgerbadger.com]

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There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

Woah (Score:5, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Good luck! (Score:5, Funny)

YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME (Score:5, Funny)

Sweet Job! (Score:5, Funny)

Dr Who (Score:5, Funny)

Linuxsoft (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Anakin (Score:5, Funny)

former founder? (Score:2, Funny)

It's gonna take them a while... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

NOOOOOOOOO! (Score:2, Funny)

Microsoft uses PPC, Apple uses Intel, now this ? (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Good luck! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Woah (Score:2, Funny)

Latency (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Anakin (Score:1, Funny)

Quick, we can still rescue him! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

can't wait! (Score:4, Funny)

You will never rescue him, We have him now! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Ooooook, *scary* (Score:5, Funny)

Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Microsoft uses PPC, Apple uses Intel, now this (Score:5, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Ooooook, *scary* (Score:2, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Yes ! (Score:1, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:It is very sad that he could not make money (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Former Founder? (Score:2, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

Fear not! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:1, Funny)

Re:YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME (Score:1, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:1, Funny)

Longhorn (Score:2, Funny)

PLD seeks NBF*. (Score:3, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Bad moderation (Score:2, Funny)

Re:hmm... (Score:2, Funny)

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Ooooook, scary (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Ooooook, scary (Score:2, Funny)