Because the number of abductions in Mexico has jumped almost 40% in the past 3 years, the wealthy are getting subcutaneous transmitters so they can be tracked when kidnapped. Xega, the Mexican security firm which makes the chips, has seen a sales jump of 13% this year. The company injects the crystal-encased chip, the size and shape of a grain of rice, into clients' bodies with a syringe. The chip then sends radio signals to a larger device carried by the client with a global positioning system in it. A satellite can then be used to find the location of the missing person. Things must be a lot worse in Mexico than I thought.

The bridge club was never the same after they got that motorcycle.

In addition to Iocane powder, Mr. Miller has built up a tolerance to toxic waste.

Next week, follow Billy's dotted-line path into madness.

France's broadcast authority has banned the marketing of TV shows to children under 3, to protect them from the potential of developmental problems. The ruling also mandates that French cable operators airing foreign channels with programs for babies have to broadcast warning messages to parents. The messages will read: "Watching television can slow the development of children under 3, even when it involves channels aimed specifically at them." I guess there won't be any French contestants in this year's Baby Fear Factor.

I know that times are hard but I think grandma is going to need her teeth.

I know he's one of the worst dictators in history but just look how cute those cheeks are.

California lawmakers are pushing a bill that would ensure electric vehicles make enough noise to be heard by blind and visually impaired people. The state senate has already passed the bill but the governator hasn't yet taken a position. If passed, the bill would establish a committee which would study ways electric vehicles could make more noise. The committee's recommendations would be due by 2010. May I suggest a siren or some baseball cards in the wheels.

In this week's Disagree Mail, I try to show the range of messages I get. It's not all angry or insane, sometimes it's sent to us for no apparent reason. We start off a little mad, slip into a whole bunch of crazy and finish with someone who has a complaint about racism at his favorite restaurant. Read below to get started.

It turns out Michael isn't a very gracious winner.

They should just let other babies take away his milk money now.

Could someone please send this kid some friggin' wheels?

The quest for perfect toast starts early in some.

New classroom grading rules in Dallas are drawing fire from teachers and parents as being too lenient on lazy students. The new rules would require teachers to accept late work, give retests to students who fail and force teachers to drop homework grades that would drag down a student's class average. Nancy Bingham, a former teacher, said that she didn't think the rules would help really lazy students adding, "If the kid is hell-bent on failing, they're going to fail anyway." Dallas school superintendent Michael Hinojosa disagrees, saying, "Our mission is not to fail kids. Our mission is to make sure they get it, and we believe that effort creates ability." It's a lot easier to reach for the stars if you lower the sky.

German police have confiscated the world's fastest office chair and arrested its 17-year-old inventors. The duo added a lawnmower engine, brakes and a metal frame to the office chair and were reported to be driving it all over the streets of Gross-Zimmern. Police did not comment on the chair's handling or acceleration but I look forward to it being profiled on Top Gear.

Can you eat a seal?

They got along fine until someone switched their bottles.

The gentleness and beauty of nature is undeniable.

I have the newer two-dog power version at home.

jedie noted an impressive rendering of the Beijing Olympics in Lego. Featuring 300,000 bricks, and 4,500 Lego people, it was built by the Hong Kong Lego User Group. Yes that exists. Amazing. I'm pretty sure that the lighting inside the water cube was not made using stock legos. At least, none in my giant cardboard box.