LAMP Grid Application Server, No More J2EE

An anonymous reader writes "Check out this blog entry in Loosely Coupled about ActiveGrid's new open source Grid Application Server based on the LAMP (Linux, Apache, MySQL, PHP/Python/Perl) stack. Not to start another PHP vs. Java flame war, but it looks like LAMP is starting to grow up, and that it is much better suited for next generation applications than J2EE."

"Not to start another flamewar BUT..."

[rleyton]

...LAMP is much better suited for next generation applications than J2EE?

Not provocative at all that. No. Not in the slightest.

I'm sure the flamewar that no doubt follows is merely a figment of our collective imaginations.

What the?

[Prophetic_Truth]

Not to start another PHP vs. Java flame war, but it looks like LAMP is starting to grow up, and that it is much better suited for next generation applications than J2EE."

Thats like me saying, "Not to offend you, but check out goatse.cx!"

ITS JUST NOT POSSIBLE TO HAVE IT BOTH WAYS!

Re:"Not to start another flamewar BUT..."

[timbloid]

It's the Slashdot equivalent of saying "No offense" after doubting someone's parentage to their face ;)

Re:In which world?

[Anonymous Coward]

Begun this flame war has.

Re:I haven't RTFA, but...

[dave420]

No, 'cos then you have LAPP.

ba-DING.

RTFA

[aled]

"Of course, calling its platform an application server is something of a marketing ploy since, as Peter has explained, an application server is the last thing you need. What ActiveGrid is really providing is a highly tuned "text pump" to occupy the fabric/bus space in a transaction-intensive enterprise data center."

Translation?

[Jacques Chester]

I tried every online translator I could, however the article still comes out as absolute gibberish.

What with the concurrent text pump synergies, next languages, impedance mismatches and grid quantum antipolarity trilithium subspace continuums, I got a bit lost.

Anyone understand what they're peddling?

Re:I haven't RTFA, but...

[NickeB]

Which is the swedish word for patch... It's a sign I tell you!

Re:Get a fucking grip

[Anonymous Coward]

Welcome to Slashdot, were a sad teenager with a laptop can register a SourceForge project and declare that he's going to take over the world within 12 months, and the mindless idiots which infest this place eat it up. I wouldn't be surprised if some fanboy hasn't already rushed off to draft a memo to his boss on why they need to dump their J2EE platform right now in favour of Grid/LAMP. He read it on Slashdot, it must be true. Look, it even has a SourceForge project page!

No one needs to do the hard work any more, oh now. Just come up with any old idea and the world is yours. The implementation is a mere derail.

I blame Gentoo myself. It's turned a bunch of clueless but previously harmless idiots into a bunch of clueless but deluded "hackers" who think that copying someone elses CFLAGS from a forum post makes them a compiler engineer and Open Source Guru. Bah.

I don't mean to start a Flame War...

[Galapas]

but Emacs kicks the crap out of vi...

-G

Re:Get a fucking grip

[Anonymous Coward]

The Gentoy ricers are nice squishy targets and I'm in a bad mood. I need to draw them out of the bushes.

For you, look on the bright side. It could have been, I could have mentioned Unbuntu, another prime breeding ground for lame little kids with delusions of grandiur.

Oh, whoops.

Flamewar

[pigeon]

"Not to start a flamewar, but you java developpers are a foul smelling, foul tasting bunch!"

Re:Translation?

[Jacques Chester]

I knew it! Bloody proprietary Enterprise-class designs!

GAS LAMP

[suso]

Grid Application Server based on the LAMP

So does that make it a GAS LAMP?

*ta dit boom*

Quite the reverse

[kahei]

He's saying: use a suite of highly-optimized tools (the various LAMP components, most of which are fast and all of which can be replaced with alternatives as necessary) rather than throw more hardware at an inherently slow platform (Java).

It's all pretty much a matter of what you were brought up with. On the other hand, I'm working for a household-name client now that's banned Java across the board because they got sick of the 'buy more chips' solution to performance problems. Acceptable platforms: LAMP and .NET.

Finally!

[Anonymous Coward]

Finally, a break from the Sun tax. Yeah, you know the one -- the one that makes you pour hundreds and hundreds of wasted man-hours into using poorly written programs with little or no documentation. What can you expect from crappy code written by scientists and corporations? I'll happily use code written by hobbyists any day, no matter what News for Nerds declares. Honestly, I know most of you agree with me!

Re:"Not to start another flamewar BUT..."

[Alpha27]

Ha, you naive little underlying...

I use carrier pigeons to transmit the hole punch data to chicken routes, that spits out egg packets to your computers.

Next week, we are migrating to ant communication through the use of their scent glands for communication. Open Source all the way... just grab an ant and hack the chemistry and the biology.

Re:"Not to start another flamewar BUT..."

[GreyWolf3000]

That's nothing. I have a team of 11,000 midgets, with a dedicated sub-grouping of 26 midgets leading 13 categories, all shouting ones and zeroes in seemingly random succession, either to the group itself or to a "router" group.

Oh, and they snarl.

Re:"Not to start another flamewar BUT..."

[Bill, Shooter of Bul]

Not to start another flamewar BUT...

Here is a box of matches and a gallon of gasoline. Lets see who can light a mathc quickest after being drenched in gasoline.

Re:In which world?

[smcdow]

... and use CORBA mappings ...

Some people, when confronted with a problem, say, "Let's use CORBA."

Now they have two problems.

Re:What the?

[Anonymous Coward]

> Mysql is improving though but I would rather be castrated than use it in a big warehouse.

Wow. I must get more use out of my boys, because frankly I'll make do with COBOL and raw ISAM calls or flatfiles or Access, if castration were the alternative...

Re:Developing distributed apps is very hard with J

[The AtomicPunk]

Whatever drug you're on, send me some.