SCO Attorney Declares GPL Invalid

chrullrich writes "According to heise (German, fishbait), SCO's chief counsel Mark Heise (unrelated) of Boies, Schiller and Flexner has declared that the GPL violates the US copyright law and is thus null and void. SCO's legal position is actually a little too crazy to believe: The GPL allows unlimited copies, the copyright law allows one. Therefore, the GPL is invalid. Apparently, they try to argue that the copyright law, in giving consumers the right to make one backup of their software without any permission from the copyright holder, outlaws any contractual agreement that allows users to make more than one copy." There's an Inquirer article in English. Apparently SCO is now using the Chewbacca Defense. Other SCO news: SCO reports a profit, examining SCO's contributions to Linux, an attorney summarizes the case.

And the GPL....

[icemax]

Declares SCO invalid! OOH!

And I declare...

[KillerHamster]

...that SCO does not exist. HA!

Chewbacca Defense?

[grub]

You mean SCO is going to go after George Lucas?

in additional news...

[bongoras]

SCO has declared that the earth is actually flat, that you *can* dig a hole to China, and that the moon is, in fact, made of green cheese.

SCO's legal team

[Hieronymus Howard]

I've often heard of companies having a crack legal team, but this is the first time that I've heard of one being on crack.

HH

Wow, simply amazing

[Raul654]

And SCO is paying how much per hour for this legal mastery?

The future of SCO.

[gregarican]

I think they will combine forces with Banyan and Lantastic to usher in a new era of useless has-beens.

What a joke. Johnnie Cochran must be part of their legal team.

... and why wouldn't they?

[*weasel]

if the gpl is -legal- then they have no legal legs to stand on.

-of-course- they'll 'declare it' illegal.

thank goodness their lawyer's opinions matter only slightly more than my cat's.

chewbaca defense

[Trinity-Infinity]

If they can use the chewbaca defense, I'm calling SHENANIGANS!!!

SCO lisencing screwed me out of a job

[TrollBridge]

As an ex-employee of a Fortune 500 company that recently purchased the controversial (and pricey) SCO Linux lisences [slashdot.org], I can say from experience that SCO doesn't take kindly to opposition.

I first became concerned for my job three weeks before my employer purchased the lisences, when I noticed our mail administrator returning from a meeting with our comapny's board of directors. The conversation had gotten rather heated, as there had been a good deal of shouting and cursing coming from the board room. Two days later he was fired.

Rumors began spreading when 3 more people were laid off under similar circumstances, and the general consensus was that these people had been unfairly screwed by management.

I had no idea how true those rumors were. I soon found myself before the board of directors, being asked what I thought about purchasing Linux lisences for our servers from SCO. I answered truthfully: that not only was such an investment a waste of money, but that SCO's claims regarding intellectual property in Linux were questionable at best. My supervisor considered this thoughtfully for a second, nodded, and the secretary locked the door of the office. Two of the directors, with deceptive strength and agility, bound and gagged me. My memory is somewhat blurry about this part, but I remember having my pants torn from my waist, and then all of the board members took turns ravaging my virgin cornhole. The rumors were true: there I was, being screwed by management because of my opposition to SCO's Linux IP claims .

In the kind of shock that only comes with a brutal ass-raping, I stumbled back to my desk, thankfully unaware of the small stream of blood, liquified stool, and man-cheese that had stained my underwear, oozed down my leg and began to pool in my shoe. To complete my utter humiliation, I was given my pink slip 3 days later, before I had even recovered from my ordeal.

I have always been concerned about SCO's dubious legal claims, but I could never have prepared myself for the amount of personal violation that opposing the corporate bully would bring.

Re:Hold up a second...

[EMH_Mark3]

Well everyone knows that two wrongs don't make a right, but three copyrights make a copyleft :)

How can I join the party?

[Anonymous Coward]

Wildly offtopic, I know, but I was just wondering if anyone had reverse engineered the msblast payload yet. I'm sitting here with all these linux boxes on a fat pipe, and I heard there was a party planned next saturday in Redmond. I feel a bit left out and would hate to install 2k/XP just to be able to join in. Can anyone help out?

Witty, lightly sarcastic headline

[djh101010]

Vague expansion of witty idea, looking like every other one-liner predictably posted to the thread.

--
Pointless and/or overly-geeky quote

Re:And the GPL....

[Anonymous Coward]

That would be in Soviet Russia, comrade.

Re:So I can't copy something I create?

[IFF123]

No, they are agruing that whatever you create doesn't belong to you.
I am waiting for the next SCO press conference where McBride will announce that "all your bases now belong to us".

PS: M$Bride knows that the only way they can getout of prizon sentence in the end is to demonstrate their insanity now. So far it's working well...

In other news...

[Jasin Natael]

SCO has announced an agreement with the Business Software Alliance to raid data backup centers. SCO CEO Darl McBride was quoted as saying "These renegade 'backup' centers are no more than a front for illegitimate software duplication. Any customers who are found to have multiple 'backup' copies of any of SCO's intellectual property will be required to pay additional licensing fees, according to the number of processors in the machine that served as the source for these illicit duplicates."

Future targets, according to the press release, may include schools, small businesses, and FTP 'mirrors', which not only house myriad copies of copyrighted works, but also make them available to further illegal duplication by end users.

SCO Claims that copyright law prohibiting multiple backups of information may also cover music, movies, and published works. The RIAA and MPAA were reportedly intrigued, but unavailable for comment.

--Jasin Natael

Re:when do we get a SCO section on /.

[Anonymous Coward]

funny, it seems more like every 2 *hours*. sigh

sco

[loconet]

sco .. drugs are bad mmmmmmmm-kay?

Re:...and I declare SCO "petunias"...

[plover]

[because it needs to be done:]

1. Use the Chewbacca defense.
2. ???
3. Report Profit! [com.com]

The news story is kind of tragicomic, McBribe says "We intend to use this capital to continue our intellectual property protection and licensing initiative..."

I wish all their customers would simply stop giving them money. I know my company has; we've ditched using the products that ran on the SCO platform, but that's only about 60-70 licenses. The rest of you need to pony-up!

Re:So I can't copy something I create?

[AndroSyn]

In Soviet Russia authority questions you..oh wait, that really did happen in Soviet Russia, nevermind.

Silent Majority?

[mod_parent_down]

"I would say that the silent majority is behind SCO in this case," McBride said.

In the RED Corner, weighing in at $140M, we have the Self-Proclaimed Siiiilent Majorrrity. . .

And in the BLUE corner, weighing in at One Hunnnndred and Fifty Beeeellion Dollars, The Heavyweight Champion of Patent Litigation, DEEEEEEEEP POCKETTTTTTTS!!!!

Round 1.

Fight!

Re:when do we get a SCO section on /.

[Anonymous Coward]

there is a post every 2 days about SCO

Not for long

I've Got It Figured Out

[thomas.galvin]

I've got it figured out. SCO is trying to throw out so many baseless accusitions, and fill the air with so much nonesense, that we simply become numb, unable to deal with it, or respond in a coherent manner.

It's like a two year old that keeps arguing that the sky is, in fact, green, and that he'll never grow up to be a basketball player if you don't let him eat cookies for breakfast. It's cute the first couple of times, then becomes slightly annoying, but eventually you are so baffled by the shear stupidity that you stop tyring to correct him, stop trying to prove your point, and simply say 'yes, dear.'

That, my friends, is SCO; Litigation through Temper Tantrum.

Re:...and I declare SCO "petunias"...

[Alan]

Based on the continuingly insane SCO claims, I'd say that massive head trauma, or the smoking of some really bad weed got us into this mes to begin with...

Re:Hold up a second...

[Jaysyn]

...for very large values of 2....

Jaysyn

Re:howto: disable caldera news

[davmct]

what are you doing posting here then? that option must be working really well... ;)

ROTFLMAO

[john82]

Dear Darl,

Thanks, I needed that. Can't remember when I heard something so goddamn funny. I nearly blew Mountain Dew through my nose on that one.

What, you're serious?! Ssnnnorrkkk!!! Damn, that's even funnier! Have you guys thought about doing a stand-up routine somewhere?

Really. Just too f'ing funny. Pardon me while I wipe the tears out of my eyes.

You're the best,
Bill Gates

Copywrong

[gunix]

is when the copymachine get a serious paperjam.

Re:Witty, lightly sarcastic headline

[Knife_Edge]

Clarification and development of witty idea. Summary of legal points:

1) This is all wrong
2) Geeks rule
3) I like tuna

Extended rant about moral issues surrounding situation. Oh the humanity, what is wrong with these people? Is there no justice in the world? I fear for the future of civilization.

Anger filled unreasonable solution - Let's all throw rocks! They can't stop all of us!

Re:when do we get a SCO section on /.

[Glyndwr]

I predict we'll get our section three days before IBM crushes them to death in court.

My God.. SCO has gone PLAID...

[Dutchmaan]

They've attempted *ludicrous speed*!

Re:Copywrong

[xanadu-xtroot.com]

"PC Load Letter?!? What the fuck does that mean?!?"

- Michael

Re:Hold up a second...

[blibbleblobble]

"Copyleft is not a principle the law recognizes."

And not a character the Unicode recognises.

Bastards.

Battle of Stalingrad?

[AtariAmarok]

"SCO, they're about to get on the wrong side of Microsoft too, since MS..."

Are you hoping for a Battle of Stalingrad situation, where there is really no site to cheer for?

Or is the Godzilla vs Rodan analogy more appropriate? Or would a simple shark feeding-frezny do.

This is what it's like when worlds collide....

Re:Hmm

[grazzy]

From the inquirerarticle:

Has the whole world gone stark staring bonkers? [Yes. Ed.]

That does it!

[Jaguar777]

IBM: That does it! Shenanigans! Shenanigans!!!
SCO: What are you doing?
IBM: I'm declaring Shenanigans on you. This lawsuit is rigged.

SCO says it's invalid, so pay up!!!

[Newsome]

Oh, well. If SCO says the GPL is invalid, then obviously it's time to pay up [byu.edu]!!!

If I were to play with metaphors,

[Anonymous Coward]

I might put something together like:

- ./ troll == turd.
- SCO lawyer == eats /. troll.

but, I would be trolling.

This really is much more fun

[lone_marauder]

...now that I don't have to take it seriously. I love the department tagline. Somehow the sight of a monkey in a fez seems utterly fitting. Any chance we could make that the new SCO icon?

Re:Battle of Stalingrad?

[Soko]

Or is the Godzilla vs Rodan analogy more appropriate?

IMHO this case will more resemble Bambi vs Godzilla. SCO's about to get squashed.

Or would a simple shark feeding-frezny do.

There's an old joke about sharks not eating lawyers out of professional courtesy. Draw your own conclusions.

Soko

Re:Chewbacca Defense?

[Waab]

You mean SCO is going to go after George Lucas?

I think it goes something like this:
Darl (dressed up in a monkey suit) sits playing a game of chess with a giant penguin. The penguin makes a move and announces he'll have mate in one. Darl begins to scream, jump up and down, and hurl fecal matter. At this point, Bill Gates, wearing a gold suit, pokes his head in to suggest that the penguin "let the wookie win."

In other news...

[not_a_george]

SCO declares Law of gravity invalid, as servers with linux use it to stay on the ground.

Re:Chewbacca Defense?

[thryllkill]

Maybe they can get him before shooting for Episode 3 starts. Oh SCO Pleeeeaaaase make it not suck...

Re:Hmm

[Anonymous Coward]

Disclaimer - IANAL, I'm also Canadian

Excellent. I think all Canadians should be required to use IAC somewhere in their posts, so we can give their opinion the proper weight.

Re:in additional news...

[mydn]

Your attempt to dissemble the "Flat-Earth-Hole-To-China" intellectual property is a clear violation of the DMCA. SCO will soon declare you invalid.

Re:SCO and UNIX

[caferace]

SCO is going straight for the Jugular...

Yeah, with a Q-Tip.

Pathetic.

Re:"Insightful?" Grrrrrrr... GPL !=Public Domain!

[Soko]

Whoa there - I agree with you.

I'm asserting that the tack that SCOs lawyers seem to be taking is to try and push GPLed works into the public domain and not copyright.

Soko

Re:Hold up a second...

[harley_frog]

Perhaps SCO plans on pleading insanity (or stupidity, you choose) as their defense.

$1M in legal fees per quarter???

[mykepredko]

In the news.com article, it states "He [McBride] said the company had spent between $600,000 and $700,000 on legal expenses since March, less than half of the $1 million per quarter it has budgeted for such costs."

SCO is budgeting $333k per month to go up against the company that took on the part of the United States government that literally prints money and won?

Before reading this, I was willing to discount the comments about Darl and his merry men being on crack, but after reading this the only question I have is:

Darl, where can I find some of what you're smoking, swallowing, snorting or injecting?

myke

Re:Are you PURPOSELY being thick?!?

[stames]

the JPL is null and void under U.S. copyright law

Quick! Someone call NASA!

Dear Darl,

[geekoid]

I'm sorry I wasn't clear in our last conversation.
What I meant to say is "Get crack team of lawyers", not "Get that team of lawyers some crack".

Sorry for any inconviences

In breaking news from the former USSR:

[XaXXon]

In soviet Russia, the GPL declares SCO invalid.

Donate?

[autopr0n]

Who said anything about 'donate'? Why would I want to 'donate' code to anyone for any reason? Why on earth would I want to 'donate' my code to you? You're a dick. If I want to GPL something, that's my choice. I don't give up 'ownership' of the code in the way I would if I put it in the public domain.

Open source is better for catching theives.

[adamshelley]

At least open source software you can point out parts that may have been misappropriated and remove them. Imagine how much misappropriated code could be in windows but no one will be able to prove that.

Imagine this: in 10 years, windows will be on sourceforge as a GPL'd project (heads of M$ were killed by an army of mechanical penguins and microsoft was forced to shutdown). Then each of you can pick out the code that they stole from your project.

Re:The law establishes a floor

[Stalemate]

(IANAL, but this is basic stuff that everyone should know.)

Is it just me, or does anyone else read IANAL and pronounce it in your head as "I anal"? It drives me crazy.

Go ahead, mod me down as stupid or whatever, but I know someone else has to read it that way.

Re:Hold up a second...

[Anders]

Well everyone knows that two wrongs don't make a right, [...]

... but two Wrights make an aeroplane.

Re:The law establishes a floor

[Anonymous Coward]

That would be iAnal(TM) the first in Apple's new line of internet enabled buttplugs.

Re:Chewbacca Defense?

[EpsCylonB]

Remember, if Chewbacca lived on Endor then you must acquit.

And in other news...

[Odinson]

About 10,000 Linux advocates laughed themselves to death today, France is now confused about weather to add their share of the dead nerds to the heat death toll. In an official response to the sea SCO's chairman said there will now be weekly wild assertaions until the case is lost... errr he meant won.

Re:Trial by jury... *shudder*

[Ian Wolf]

All we need is one slashdotter on the jury and SCO is doomed. I just hope it isn't the penis bird man, the Natalie Portman stalker, or the grits fetishist.

I can see Boies during voire dire.

Boies: "Have you ever read Slashdot?"
Juror: uh.......yeah
Boies: "Your honor I move to have this juror excused."
Juror: "But all I ever post is hot grits and natalie portman posts."
Boies: "Oh, sorry your honor. We'll keep him."

That's good then

[Snaller]

I won't have to read it then, Tried before always got a headache.

Re:The law establishes a floor

[worm eater]

Go ahead, mod me down as stupid or whatever, but I know someone else has to read it that way.
(Score:5, Insightful)

Is it just me or do posters always get modded up whenever they dare the moderators to mod them down?

Please mod me down, I'm a redundant, trolling, flamebait-loving dogmatist and I was a pro-DMCA lobbyist. And I'm sleeping with Darl.

Re:The law establishes a floor

[stuntpope]

No, that was Asimov's little-known collection of sci-fi erotica.

Ok, karma dive.

Well..

[deadgoon42]

I declare SCO it be invalid.

There that should solve all our problems!

Chewbacca Defense, Argentinian Attack

[ospirata]

Yes, this SCO deal is pissing everybody off. If the original post says they are using th chewbacca defense, I would go further and say that they used the Argentinian attack, just like at Falkland.

SCO vs. Slashdot Trolls

[InfiniteVoid]

Like lame Slashdotters who post before reading the article, SCO's lawyers appear to have not even bothered to read the GPL before declaring it illegal.

Re:Hold up a second...

[vsprintf]

I think this is just a floater for Boies, etc., to see how well it will fly. . . Remember, they demanded a trial-by-jury.

Ah, I now understand the term "trial balloon".

There's something being overlooked here...

[Angst Badger]

SCO has been going on about Linux being in violation of the law, IBM being in violation of the law, Linux users being in violation of the law, and now, incredibly, the GPL being in violation of the law on the grounds that copyright ownership prohibits you from transferring copying privileges, all of which point to the big question that nobody so far has asked:

Isn't having an entire company full of people smoking crack in violation of the law?

Re:Trial by jury... *shudder*

[dipipanone]

can see Boies during voire dire.

Boies: "Have you ever read Slashdot?"
Juror: uh.......yeah

Boies: Then you'll know that in Soviet Russia, intellectual property steals YOU. By stealing other people's intellectual property, SCO are simply engaged in the sort of anti-communist activity that's necessary to protect our way of life.

Judge (who is a Microsoft troll): Somebody mod that sucker UP!

Re:Whoa! I think I know WHAT they're counting on

[paganizer]

"hey! glad to see you? hows it been? come on over here and have a seat.. can I get you a drink? are you sure? cigarette? no? fine, fine...
Listen, I'm glad we had this chance to talk privately for a second, there was something I've been wanting to tell you, and I don't see any reason to discuss it it front of just everybody, right?
There is this little thing that everyone else on the planet has been aware of for quite a while now, that you just can't seem to get a grasp on......"

contempt of court?

[bbc22405]

Um, if SCO's lawyers do ever argue this in front of a judge, does this sort of stupidity count as one of the things for which a judge can declare the lawyer in contempt? Something along the lines of "Mr. SCO Lawyer, in recognition of your extreme ignorance of copyright law and for wasting our time, I'm fining you $500."