Mandrake Appealing to Community, Again

An anonymous reader writes "It seems that MandrakeSoft's short-term financial problem is worse than was thought. A new page on the Mandrake web site says: 'Everyone who is concerned with the company's future is encouraged to read and distribute the following message. In order to reach the next release, MandrakeSoft currently needs to raise cash, and quickly complete the Increase of Capital.' Darn, and I thought they were almost over this hump. Looks like a good time to help recruit Mandrake supporters for the Club."

My appeal

[Anonymous Coward]

This is my appeal to the Slashdot community:

I am a 31 year old male virgin and I really, really need to lose my virginity this year. At this point I don't care if you're a guy or the world's skankiest geekette. If you are willing to finally make me a man, please reply to this post with your address. I'll fly over next week.

you got it wrong!

[RobertTaylor]

"If you are a qualified investor who would like to participate in the current round of financing, please contact [e-mail] with the amount you wish to invest."

What if your loaded but stupid? I would have thought dumb rich people would be the way forward...

Re:Pardon?

[British]

"Please help these needy software developers. Your donation can get a Linux developer a brand new system, a 100 gig SCSI drive, or maybe a clean t-shirt. For the cost of a Mountain Dew you can give a developer some Mountain Dew to develop trivial new Linux applications you might not ever use or understand. Is that too much to ask for a command-line driven utility?"

For each Linux developer you sponsor, you will recieve a 45K JPEG portrait, and a monthly email detailing his progress."

Yeah...

[Anonymous Coward]

I have a big fucking sack of cash that I don't need; I'll send it to them. Poor company...

Me too

[Pac]

I have a start-up company and we make stuff, you know. People like it, our stuff. But people have not been buying so much of our stuff lately and Christmas is expensive with all this gifts and foods and, you guessed, stuff.

So, if you want to donate to my company, leave your email, phone number and the amount you would like to donate in a reply here. We will be contacting you soon (probably next year, Holidays being what they are). We will also send you a nice stuff T-shirt for you donnation.

Re:My appeal

[Anonymous Coward]

Ok, if you insist...

Alan M Ralsky
6747 Minnow Pond Dr
West Bloowfield Township, MI 48322-2663

Re:hey

[Anonymous Coward]

So, are you a guy or the world's skankiest geekette?

I hope it dies!

[Anonymous Coward]

I paid £70 for the 8.1 PowerPack last christmas it was the most buggiest linux distro I ever seen!

I got more bang for my quid with SuSe 8.0, and I'm using it now because it aint a hacked together mess like mandrake is!

Any way "Man-drake" sounds like gay slang!

Re:Your Appeal

[Anonymous Coward]

Bill Gates

1 I Am God Drive

Redmond, WA

Bring light beer, a big black rubber dildo, a copy of "Hardcore Gay Robot Beach Weekend 3" starring C-3P0, and plenty of KY. I'll be waiting in my best thongs, big boy...

Pop culture *always* has the answer

[ohboy-sleep]

I think it's best we look at Hollywood to answer this little problem. What happened when George Newman needed money to save his UHF station, U62? Why, he sold shares in the company.

Why should someone donate $50 or whatever to Mandrake and see the same benefit as the guy who donated nothing?

Now all they need is Stanley Spidowski's Word Processing program pre-installed as well as Conan the Librarian's File-Sharing client.

Clearly French government should pitch in

[Anonymous Coward]

since the French love social assistance and subsidies and Vive La France and stuff like that.

Re:hey

[clem]

The fact that this was modded +1 Informative has nearly cost me my bladder control and dignity.

Are they going to give us a giant Penguin

[Anonymous Coward]

for Boston Harbor if we bail them out again?

Or a giant hat for the bail out hat trick?

Re:Please help Mandrake!

[Anonymous Coward]

I am a Slashdot subscriber. Are you?

Wow. I've got mod points. I wish there was a mod level for 'Dork'.

Re:it would be so cool

[Anonymous Coward]

if would be so cool if Red Hat bought Mandrake

Why don't they just download Mandrake for free?

Re:hey

[ASMprogrammer]

Wow, the first literal karma whore.

Re:Please help Mandrake!

[Anonymous Coward]

A dork moderation level is just redundant for this crowd. 99% of the posts would be deserving of it. Though maybe that plus a "posted from parents' basement" mod level would get you somewhere.

Dang it If only

[Anonymous Coward]

Enron had thought of this, soo many people
would not have lots their retirment plans.
and if only United had thought of this,
they wouldnt have had to cut wages.

Silly dumb big companies.
Come to Slashdot, will fill yer pockets.

what are you doing?

[Anonymous Coward]

509 Pepperidge Ln
San Antonio, TX 78213

John Romero's address?
What [penny-arcade.com] kind [penny-arcade.com] of [penny-arcade.com] woman [penny-arcade.com] are [penny-arcade.com] you? [penny-arcade.com]

Re:hey

[Anonymous Coward]

Dear God that's just a few houses down. And I thought I was the "weirdo internet nut" in the neighborhood.